There ought to be a law

I am listening to the morning news programs this morning as we have our winter break today. Yep. We get one whole day. A Friday to boot. Anyway, I just saw some group of "professionals" who are offering to watch the octuplets and their six siblings for free. What about people who have 3 kids and don't know how to take care of them and they live in the middle of nowhere instead of California. I have so many parents who would benefit from someone offering to watch their kids and give them physical therapy and speech therapists and language specialist and educational advice. They could use someone to give them clothes and nutrition help, not only advice but food. These "angels" are offering this help in a clean place that they provide and the mother can be there too. Why do you have to be totally irresponsible to get all this help? They reward her for doing something she planned and thought out... for a long time...that she knew she did not have the resources to carry out. In cases like the Duggars? from Arkansas, where they have 18 kids and seem to be able to provide for their kids, at least the basic care, then go ahead and have kids but in cases like this, she deserves to have them taken away. We have laws about puppy mills but not about people like this. We go in and raid and take the puppies and dogs and give them to loving homes that are researched and approved, yet here are 14 children with a mother, and only a mother, that doesn't know how to take care of them and has no common sense or money. She is still in school for Pete's sake. There are so many homes that are able and want children, that I say give them to loving homes. She can have visitation. I know this is not politically correct thinking. When I turned 30 years old and was not married but wanted a baby more than anyone knows, I thought about having a baby. But.. I am a teacher that lives a long ways from my family and support group. I did not at that time have a lot of extra money. I did have a friend who said he would give me the needed material to have a baby. But after much thought I decided that raising a child in a single parent home purposely, and not having the money to provide extra care, and knowing that I would have to work full time all the time to make it work, was not a responsible choice. I did not go through with the procedure and thus, I do not have a child. Did I want to? Yes, very much. But I was raised in a single parent family that did have a lot of family support and sometimes it was very frustrating for me as a child and I know now that it was very difficult for my mother. Sometimes, you make decisions based on facts and you have to think of the long term effect. Having a baby when I was thirty would not have been the best decision. I could do it now, but now I am too old. This gal that has 14 children is a very selfish woman who is hoping for the generosity of other people. Lucky for her, she lives in California where there are resources and people willing to give her what she wants. I do want the best for the children but being raised by such a selfish mother is not going to be the best. I teach children with selfish mothers and it is a lose-lose situation. Right now I have a student who lives with her mother and her mother's boyfriend,who is on the list of sexual offenders for rape. This mother has 3 little girls and she surrounds them with people who are going to jail or who have been in jail. As my student told me one day, "Everyone in my family has been in jail at some time." Anyway, this child misses school for many reasons but all the time. I think she has been absent 15 days and tardy for 14 days. Her mother can't provide anything for our parties or our classroom but they got a Wii for Christmas and now this week, "Mom got us TVs for the car. She got two of them." But.. we needed a drink for our Valentine's party and they couldn't afford to provide that. When we had cold weather this fall, she didn't have a coat and "Mom doesn't have the money to buy me a coat." So, I bought a coat for her. On Monday she showed up in a new coat that Grandma got her.(We keep the coat in the room as an extra coat and another of my girls wears it at recess as her coat doesn't have a hood and is very light weight. This family also got a Wii for Christmas, yet my student wore the same shirt three days out of four this week.) You know, I think I got off topic but my mind is racing thinking about people and their children. I was raised in a single family household but my mom was anything but selfish. Parents need to put their children first. I read all the magazines that say your marriage and husband come first but I don't think that is true. Once you have children, they should come first. If you have a healthy family, you shouldn't have to choose who comes first as everything will be the same. You can love everyone. But kids are dependent. They need love and care and safety but they also need to have a parent there for them. OK enough for now but this has been weighing heavy on my heart.